Monday Motivation – Love Yourself-Accept Yourself-Forgive Yourself

Throughout my journey I have found that the majority of people do not love themselves. It’s a question people don’t ask themselves but when asked it’s an easy “no” with their head hung low.

This is where the answer to many of life‘s struggles could be found.

If we do not love ourselves, the lens through which we view our life and the world is murky. We don’t make good decisions. We engage in negative self talk. We do not live up to our potential.

In a nutshell, we are our own worst enemy.

Searching for the reason ‘why’ we do not love ourselves is not as important as beginning to love ourselves – TODAY. Start anew!

We engage in activities where we are able to list hundreds of ways we love someone else. We need to do that for ourselves.

Look in the mirror and ask yourself “do I love myself“? If the answer is yes, physically write down a list of things you do that confirm this love. If the answer is no, create a ‘to be’ list that will help you begin to love yourself and commit to it daily. No one has to even know you are working on this except yourself. 😉

More action – less talking is an order! 😊

Love Yourself, Accept Yourself, Forgive Yourself

Every Day is a New Day!

-mh💕

Monday Motivation – Relationships – Love and Respect yourself FIRST.

“As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live.” ~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

“Having boundaries is an act of respect for yourself. It shows you and the person you’re in communication with that you value yourself first and foremost.”

Ending the Cycle of Breaking Up and Getting Back Together

Happiness is not found being with another person but is found within our soul as we find our purpose in life and realize at the end of the day we are our own best friend and the only person we can truly rely on is ourself.

All relationships, personal or business, we become involved in will be much more fulfilling when this occurs. Until then, relationships are just filling voids.

~mh 💕😊

Worry – Destructive path to NOWHERE

It is possible things could turn out better than expected.

We tend to think we have a crystal ball and can know what will happen in our future. Or do we?

Intolerance of Uncertainty will certainly destroy and leads to unnecessary worry. I say be prepared for anything but don’t worry about that which we have no control.

I had a follow up diagnostic mammogram yesterday and while they could rule out malignancy on the right they could not spare the same for the left. Now, I promise this will not turn political! 😁

This is not one of those exams one is looking forward to. Are there any? 🤔 Once a year is doable but two in the same month is cruel and unusual punishment. I know it could be worse.

The lady was highly compassionate and did her best as she took image after image trying to get what she hoped would win her ‘technician of the year’. There must be an art to breast imaging. Is it the breast? The technician? The persons body shape? The machine? There is no ‘awesome’ position to place the breast for that ‘magical photo’. Women need to ban together and create an imaging device that is able to do what the current ones cannot. They say, “hold your breath” while they ‘snap’ the ‘shutter’ and one can do nothing else BUT hold their breath while a vice grip clenches down. “There has to be a better way”, I said.

She took the images to the radiologist and came back stating he asked for a redo on some. She tried again and then asked for reinforcement from her peers to assist. I told them, “a few more and then the doc will have to take his best guess”. I said it in jest but THIS hurt. 😩

They were able to get the ‘poses’ they wanted and she told me to wait in the room outside for the doctor to talk to me. I sat in a pink robe among 3 other women in similar attire. We were all of various ages. I kept telling myself, “I have known so many friends who had breast cancer. Some recovered and some not”. Could this be in my journey as well? I certainly did not think I was immune to cancer. No one is. There have been some cancer but no breast cancer in my family.

A young male doctor opens the door and calls my name, “Ms. Hatter?” I followed him into a tiny room with two chairs, small desk and a computer screen. To be honest, so many thoughts were flowing in my brain I could not recite details of that room ever again and I have somewhat of a photographic memory. Not today.

He said, briefly, “we need to do a biopsy on the left side”. He said the right was clear and of no concern. He said, “the calcification could be due to aging or cancer” and we needed to find out. I am not sure I was listening after that. I know I had questions. I always do. Not today.

I scheduled the biopsy and headed to the elevator. Retrieved my car from the valet and headed home. I was feeling pretty calm telling myself everything is going to be okay. I got this!

I read over the test results as they are accessible through MyChart. I work in the medical field so I understand most medical terminology and what I don’t know I will inquire. On the result it said “suspect malignancy”. I lost it. Crying is an understatement.

Although I believe the biopsy will be negative, it would not surprise me in the least if cancer were to pop up. So much stress since I was hit by that dastardly drunk driver last September not to mention the stress and anxiety of Covid throughout 2020. If it’s not one thing, it is another.

I quickly gathered myself and reached out to a few close friends who brought me back to calm.

It was then I decided not to worry until hearing the results next Tuesday. Perhaps there is nothing to worry about. 🤷🏼‍♀️

I cannot spend 5 days worrying about something I have no control over. Where will that get me? Nowhere. We have more control over what and how we think than we realize but it takes effort and awareness.

I go back to work today from being off 4 days. I will focus on listening to music and house hunting. Music heals and I am in the market to buy a house.

Worrying is going to be off limits!!

If there is a challenge you are facing, ask yourself, “what, if anything, do I have control of in this situation”? I bet you will be surprised to find out…. it is most likely very little if any at all.

Change the way you think! It is doable and a MUST!

Every day is a NEW day!

~mh 💕😊

Monday Motivation – Connection

So many people are walking around who have lost someone to suicide or other tragic means and one would never know it unless a conversation was created.

Whenever I meet someone and listen to their journey I am no longer surprised at what I hear.

There is so much suffering in the world and people do it in silence.

We need a culture shift to become more connected because everyone is experiencing emotional pain in one way or another.

It’s not about BEING connected. It’s about FEELING connected.

If you are not feeling connected, please reach out and talk with someone and let them know or send me a message and I will listen.

You are not alone.

~mh 💕😊

Monday Motivation – Stress Management Strategies

* Help others

* See humor in everything – more laughter

*Listen to music

*Singing – karaoke anyone? 😊

*Annual physicals to catch health issues early rather than wait for crisis.

*Drink more water

*Eat as healthy as possible as often as possible. No one is perfect.

*Engage in self care – bubble bath, manicure, pedicure, massage, facial, sit and relax, deep breathing, hug yourself, etc.

What are some ways you manage stress? Look at stress differently. It does not have to be all bad. It can challenge us or it can also let us know we need to slow down and rest.

Manage stress before it manages you.

~mh 💕😊

“Play that Funky Music”

Listening to music as well as singing heals! It can help with anxiety and depression.

Music is so very important to life.

We should never let our circumstances define who we are. Music, on the other hand, defines us from an early age. Research has shown that music listened to between the ages of 10 and 30 “defines that individual for the rest of their lives”.

I listen to a variety of music from all decades and genres but find myself gravitating back to the 70’s more often than not. That was my formative years and when I listen to the songs now I am taken back to my childhood to relive memories that are both happy and sad. This time around I am paying more attention to the lyrics and the artists. I have even begun to search song meanings. I believe we can create whatever meaning we want to each song but I find it interesting the nature in which each song was conceived.

I reminisce and can see myself at age 12 putting on headphones and singing in my room, listening over and over and writing down what I thought were the words. We did not have Google! 🥴

Vivid memories of being on the dance floor when going to clubs in high school, sitting behind Oakwood Bowling Alley with friends at age 13 are among my many reflections when listening to music and singing. The louder and more passionate I sing, the more impact the song had in my life. Takes me back to a time of innocence, less worries. A time when the future had no meaning. Oh…to be a kid again. Wait! I am still a kid! Hehe! 😁

Songs remind me where I have been and allow me to see how far I have come. I am greatly thankful for the songwriters and those who brought the words to life. I could not survive this earth without music.

I have been taking notes of the songs I would like to sing karaoke, those that give me a spark and jolt of energy to keep going. Every day is not a good day but at any point can turn around. I have experienced it solely listening to music!

Sometimes it is difficult to listen to music and that is okay. If I am really in a funk, depressed or grieving… and I have been there many times… I cannot listen to music nor sing. I listen to sports radio at that point or nothing and do some deep thinking or simply cry and that IS OKAY! I know my mood has lifted when music is enjoyable and I begin singing again.

Prior to Covid I began working on my bucket list. Road trips and going to concerts were just a few. I drove to San Francisco from Texas to see The Eagles and it was fabulous!!

Here is a sample of the many songs I have catalogued as keeping me sane and grounded. There are a few 80’s and even a few 60’s. Interestingly enough, the station on Pandora I have been listening to has not played any Elvis songs as of yet and I have been listening for awhile. Hmmm….. he was certainly one of my favorites.

Songs are listed in no particular order but merely as they were played through Pandora. I am still adding to the list. I did not realize there were soooo many!! Recognize any? 😁

Shambala – Three Dog Night 1973

Hold on Loosely – 38 Special 1981

Hold Me – Fleetwood Mac 1982

How Long – Ace 1974

China Groove – Doobie Brothers 1973

You Can Do Magic – America 1982

Sugar, Sugar – The Archies 1970

Rhiannon – Fleetwood Mac 1975

Southern Cross – Crosby, Stills and Nash 1982

Ventura Highway – America 1972

Baker Street – Gerry Rafferty 1978

Gypsy – Fleetwood Mac 1982

Judy Blues Eyes – Crosby, Stills and Nash 1969

Biggest Part of Me – Ambrosia 1980

Everything I Own – Bread 1972

Sittin’ on the Dock of the Bay – Otis Redding 1968

I can’t Go for That – Daryl Hall and John Oates 1981

Rockin’ Robin – Bobby Day 1958

Build Me Up Buttercup – The Foundations 1967

Let’s Groove – Earth Wind & Fire 1981

Sister Golden Hair – America 1975

Sweet Talkin’ Woman – Electric Light Orchestra 1978

Sweet Home Alabama – Lynyrd Skynyrd 1974

Mainstreet – Bob Seger 1972

Peace Train – Cat Stevens 1971

You Ain’t Seen Nothing Yet – Bachman-Turner Overdrive 1974

Ramblin’ Man – The Allman Brothers 1973

Evil Woman – Electric Light Orchestra 1975

I’ll Be Around – The Spinners 1973

Money For Nothing – Dire Straits 1985

Come Monday – Jimmy Buffett 1978

Lean On Me – Bill Withers 1972

Respect – Aretha Franklin 1967

Still The One – Orleans 1976

Against The Wind – Bob Seger 1979

Wasted on the Way – Crosby, Stills & Nash 1982

Shame on the Moon – Bob Seger 1982

Under the Boardwalk – The Drifters 1964

Oh Girl – The Chi-Lites 1972

Margaritaville – Jimmy Buffett 1977

Baby I’m-A Want You – Bread 1972

Take it to the Limit – The Eagles 1975

Lyin’ Eyes – The Eagles 1975

Escape (The Pina Colada Song) – Rupert Holmes 1979

Tin Man – America 1974

Get Together – The Youngbloods 1967

Last but not least……Play that Funky Music – Wild Cherry 1976

I will work on the 80’s, 90’s, 2000’s and today. Music has definitely evolved.

I hope you will make notes of songs you find uplifting or that take you back to a blast from the past. Create a playlist. It can be highly cathartic guiding you forward providing a new outlook while creating new meaning to a past gone but not forgotten.

mh – 💕😊

Where do YOU stand?

I stand against any protest that is violent no matter the cause. It seems we as a country have been walking backwards for some time and now we have stooped to an all time low. Whenever someone goes on a shooting spree we say they are mentally ill. I say people who feel compelled to partake in this type of madness need an evaluation to determine where does such rage and hatred come from? This is not civil and we can argue there were other things that happened in 2020 that were similar and those, too, were not civil but we’re dealing with this right now so let’s stay in the moment.

This country is like a dysfunctional married couple who can’t move forward because we are too busy bringing up the past all of the time.

Where is the leader of this country to slam the gavel down and say this is not acceptable and we will not allow it to be? He’s been banned from Facebook and Twitter because that’s the new way we roll. 👀🙄 🤦🏼‍♀️

A very sad day indeed. We have truly become our own worst enemy.

2021 – You made it!

2020 is now a memory. Gone but will never be forgotten.

2020 was home to illness, death, unemployment, homelessness, broken hearts and so much unanticipated anxiety, depression and a growing number of suicide attempts and completions.

Sounds like any other year but this one was quite different with the Covid Pandemic, being house bound, quarantined, masks being added to the wardrobe, no attending concerts nor sports, the closing of many businesses and being quite scared to go anywhere.

I know for me, I am lucky to be entering 2021 alive. I feel extremely Thankful. We have all had our share of challenges with some much more than others. Mine included anxiety from Covid due to being a healthcare worker in an emergency room anticipating a Covid illness while taking every precaution not to become ill, being hit by a drunk driver on my way home from work in the wee hours of the morning on September 10th and food poisoning in November which brought about more anxiety than I ever could have imagined plus a slow recovery and this was shortly after a Covid exposure from a coworker.

I have seen people come to the hospital and be admitted to the Covid floor with loved ones not able to visit. They left not knowing if they would ever see them alive again. Many days spent driving home thinking of them through tears of helplessness.

I have seen whole families Covid (+) and their elderly members suffering the greatest.

Nursing homes with Covid outbreak sending residents to multiple hospitals in a panic and then not taking them back until they have quarantined for 14 days.

People living alone with Covid anxious to return home to care for themselves sadly not wanting to tell other family members of their anxiety. The need to step in and assist with this conversation is what I do and will offer every time. Family members will listen if we talk to them and tell them what we need. It’s all about communication.

2020 has been a great example of the importance of living in the moment. We far too often live in the visions of our future. Visions are important but living is more so. Living in the moment sounds so ‘cliche’ but it really is all we have and should be doing. Your future self will thank you.

Plan for the future but don’t live there. Live in the now.

Here’s to 2021. No expectations. No resolutions. No thoughts of what is to come. There is only one day at a time and I am going to savor every moment as if it were the only one I have.

Cheers!

(Don’t forget to eat your black eyed peas!)

~mh 💕😊