Christmas tradition in our family included going to church on Christmas Eve to the candlelight service. We would then gather at my aunts house which was down the same street from my home where she had prepared a program of activities. She played piano. We would sing Christmas carols, have dinner and were allowed to open one present. I loved Christmas.
I would wake up on Christmas Day and run to the living room to find Santa had eaten the cookies and drank the milk. There were always toys, dolls, bicycles, clothes and everything on my list. I can’t think of a time I asked Santa for something that he did not deliver. I look back at my early years and feel fortunate. Very fortunate.
My aunt still lives in the same house on the street where I spent the first 11 years of life. She is now 85. We moved when I was 12 and traditions at my aunts house would be gone forever. We moved again when I was 13 and shortly after that my parents’ marriage dissolved. That would be the end of many more traditions and the beginning of new ones.
Christmas feels different now. I don’t go to church on Christmas Eve. Singing Christmas Carols has always brought tears. Tears of the memories of what was and tears of what could have been and I am sure it has something to do with the estrangement from my father and the years spent in church singing such Melodies. I remember such a happy childhood. There is a void that can never be filled.
My favorite carol is We Need a Little Christmas. I can remember singing it with my aunt at her house for the first time.
The lyrics are poignant this year.
“For I’ve grown a little leaner, grown a little colder
Grown a little sadder, grown a little older
And I need a little angel sitting on my shoulder
Need a little Christmas now.
For we need a little music, need a little laughter
Need a little singing
Ringing through the rafter
And we need a little snappy, happy ever after
We need a little Christmas now.”
I really start getting into the holiday spirit around my birthday which is the middle of December. This year I was a week into recovery from a three week severe Covid illness on my year around the sun. Thought I was getting better after the first week and then the cough came back with a vengeance and I was down another two. I am still not 100% healthy. Lingering cough they say will continue for awhile. It is actually almost resolved I do believe. Not my speedy self as Covid took me down and I had very little energy for two and half weeks and it will take some time to get back into full swing again. Now having heart palpitations which they say are post Covid symptoms so I’ll be heading to the cardiologist soon. Not thrilled about this. Covid is a beast!
Don’t get me wrong. Fortunate to be a survivor of Covid. I do count my blessings but I’m not going to let Covid take me out completely.
This year at Christmas I will be thinking of those recovering and those we lost from the pandemic and the lost lives and property from tornadoes. So much destruction, pain, trauma and sadness.
I will be thinking of the lives of those taken by drunk drivers. A drunk driver ran a red light and killed an off duty police officer and injured his wife and children. Happens every day. Senseless and so tragic.
I hope Christmas Day is filled with laughter, hugs and spending time with those who matter in your life. Those kinds of days seem few and far between.
‘We need a little Christmas!”
Merry Christmas to all! 🎁🎄🇨🇽
~Mh
I Care. Let’s Talk. 